My Weekend Crush

To think, all these years I’ve been thinking about how to get into Wonder Woman’s pants and all of a sudden I can’t stop thinking about putting on her pants. By now you’ve probably heard about the wardrobe change heard around the superverse. Women Woman wears pants – or at least some sort of industrial legging. It’s kind of shocking. My mind is at war with itself trying to decide if I hate hate hate it or think it’s progress that she no longer needs to do extensive waxing in her southern hemisphere to fight crime.

But all the talk about the Amazon Princess’ change from star-spangled hotpants and red-hot bustier to Hot Topic street fighter chic serves as a reminder of what Wonder Woman means to us. She is arguable (heck, we don’t even need to argue, this is fact) the most iconic female superhero ever. Despite her skimpy attire, she has never been salacious. She has been embraced as a feminist icon and even graced the cover of Ms. magazine. And, come on, you still wish you had a pair of those Wonder Woman Underoos like you had when you were five.

So changing her outfit is a big deal. And yet, it’s just an outfit – right? Wonder Woman still stands for what she always stood for – truth, justice and the world’s most transparent airline. She is powerful, she demands respect, she comes from a long line of female warriors. If she catches you staring at her Wonder bust too long in any outfit, she will clock you. But just think if they had originally drawn her in some sort of sensible stars-and-stripes pantsuits and then 69 years later the new guard switched her into her hotpants/hot top ensemble. The murder we’d be screaming, it’d be bloody.

In the end, I can’t get too worked up. Because this is Wonder Woman. She might finally get to wear some pants right now, but I have a sneaking suspicion that the hotpants are just at the dry cleaners. And as long as no one messes with my warm memories of Lynda Carter spinning and spinning and spinning, it’ll all be OK. Happy weekend, all.

EDITED TO ADD: Because it’s a long weekend. And because it’s the Fourth of July Weekend. And because the Fourth of July is all about the red, white and blue. And because one was more red, white and blue (pre-Hot Topic jacket and Lohan leggings) than Wonder Woman. Because of all of that, I felt like it was my patriotic duty to add this picture to the post. America, fuck yeah.