Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Why don't you come on over

Now, the other day some of you seemed seriously perplexed at my lack of Brittana/Heya in the SGALGG co-workers post. But come on, kittens, you know I love me some Brittana. I mean I really, really love them. Like more than a person my age should. Like the breakdown of why I watch “Glee” is 50 percent Brittana, 40 percent Jane Fucking Lynch, 9 percent Kurt and 1 percent everyone else. Which, of course, is why this Brittany/Artie pairing (Bartie, or more accurately, Barfie) is starting to really piss me off. They make no sense – none. Brittany hit on Artie to make Santana jealous. Artie still likes Tina. Artie and Brittany have less than zero in common. Remember the no-no boobies finger? You only deny the ones you love. And how could we forget the intertwined pinky fingers? Never, that’s how. And then this episode gave us the all-powerful beckoning finger. Oh, Santana Lopez, what you can do with just one little finger.

The Beckoning
[Hat tip, stace_ for finding The Beckoning gif!]

You know, I don’t expect a lot from “Glee.” I mean, I do I expect ridiculously elaborate musical numbers, out-of-nowhere character developments and the continued creepification of Mr. Shue. I watch it for fun and escapism and jazz hands, as I’ve said so many times before. But sometimes, just sometimes, I hope against hope that “Glee” can be more. It has done more, particularly with Kurt (though, come on guys, give that poor kid a boyfriend already). So why not let Brittana be that for the gals, too? Why force them into awkward and unnecessary straight pairings? I mean, Santana and Puck at least make a little sense. They’re both just hot and horny teenagers. But Brittany and Artie? That’s just a deliberate poke in the eye. Look, Ryan Murphy, I know you know that us gay ladies can be sustained on subtext alone for seemingly forever. We’re use to table scraps and sweeps month smooches. But that doesn’t mean that’s all you have to give us. We deserve more, so much more. Though, I am grateful for the ass slap.

Come on, Mr. Murphy, we’ve been very good this year. I think we deserve a big box of Brittana in our stocking this year.

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