Tank Top Tuesday: Music Edition

Music makes the people get together. Or at least that’s what Madonna said at the Super Bowl. But I think it also makes the people get sweaty. And when the people get sweaty, might I suggest they wear a tank top? Yeah. You saw that one coming. Today, as you might have guessed from the thrice-as-nice Pink, is all about musicians getting their tank top on. Or as Pink also illustrates, a little bit off.

Alicia KeysWas anyone else all “Whaaaat?” when you learned she was married to the CEO of Megauploads?

Brandi CarlileI had to miss her when she was in my area. I still have not forgiven myself.

Ani DiFrancoThere’s just something about a woman straddling a chair. And that something is hot.

FeistIs she going to give us some new music again? Soon, please.
p.s. Shoot, she did? Damn, never mind me & the rock I live under...

Michelle BranchI understand she’s gone country. If she keeps wearing stuff like this, I say yeehaw.

Tegan & SaraRemember when I met them over the summer? They definitely weren’t wearing this eye shadow then.

Missy HigginsShe went blonde. I know I’m not supposed to be noticing that, but oh well.

Meshell NdegeocelloPut on “Beautiful” for your girl and try to not get laid. Hint: It is impossible.

Emily HainesI could watch her dance around and play the tambourine on stage forever.

See, Madonna was right. Looking at musicians in their tank tops made us people come together. Happy Tuesday, kittens.

Tank Top Tuesday: Gone Haywire

Dude, duuuuude. Do you know about Gina Carano? No, but seriously, do you know about her? She is a now-retired mixed martial arts fighter, a former American Gladiator and fledgling actress. Hey, you, I’m talking to you. Stop staring at her guns. Or her abs. Or, you know, her whatever else you may be looking at. This is serious. OK, fine, it’s not serious. But it is seriously hot. Gina will make her starring feature film debut in “Haywire” this weekend. The action film from Steven freaking Soderbergh also features a bunch of dudes (Michael Douglas, Ewan McGregor, Channing Tatum, Michael Fassbender, Antonio Banderas), but the main attraction is Gina who plays a covert operative who gets burned and decides to burn back. In a really big way. I won’t lie, I have no idea if Gina can act. But she sure can kick ass. And she looks great in a tank top. Or a sports bra. Also whatever the hell strappy, holey contraption she is wearing above is. And for me, today, that’s more than enough reason to rejoice. Hey, it is a Tuesday. So sue me.


p.s. Did you know there is also video?

p.p.s. And just in case you want to see her in another kind of action, here is a little clip from “Haywire.” Damn, girl, is an understatement.

Tank Top Tuesday

The great thing about tank tops, besides their minimal fabric and maximum hotness, is the way they cling. A tank top knows how to fit the body. It knows where to hug and where to give. It’s a giver like that. So on someone like, say, Hope Solo, a tank top knows to get the hell out of the way, and just let that back do all the talking. Which, not entirely coincidentally, is precisely what I’m going to do as well.

Claudia BlackI probably should have watched “Farscape,” huh?

Nikki ReedI remember Nikki before she was in all this “Twilight” hoo-ha and just wanted to kiss Evan Rachel Wood.

Rosario DawsonRosario is one of the most consistent tank top wearers in the industry. Bless her generous heart.

Elisha CuthbertWho knew she was the kind of girl who liked to get drunk and to eat ribs?

Rhona MitraShe needs to be in more movies where she kicks things’ asses.

Brandi CarlileShe’s in my neck of the woods this week and I was too late to get tickets. No, I’m not crying.

Jenna UshkowitzI’m so glad the “Glee” writers remembered Jenna was on the show last episode.

Naya RiveraSpeaking of things on “Glee” I’m glad for.

Tank Top Tuesday

Sure, it’s fall. A lovely crispness has crept into the air. The leaves are showing off with one last colorful hurrah. And soon it’ll be all mittens and scarves. But that doesn’t mean we have to abandon the beauty of the simple, sheer tank top. In fact, I would argue there is no base garment more suited to the layering process thus making it an integral part of any wardrobe through all four seasons. Or, at least that’s how I’m rationalizing it in my head. Also, pretty much every place you go has nice, toasty indoor heating. So, like the indescribably lovely Shelley Conn above, get autumnal with your tank tops to your heart’s content. Just, you know, bring a jacket for when you have to go back outside.

Anna SilkHoly Badass Blue-Eyed Bo, Batman. Super Succubus came out to play, and it was lip-licking good. Check out this week’s “Lost Girl” SnapCap later today on AfterEllen.

Lena HeadeyAs happy as I am to have Lena back on TV on the regular, her new “Game of Thrones” role requires she wear considerably fewer tank tops than her “Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles” gig did.

Sasha AlexanderAs excited as I am about the return of “Rizzoli & Isles” in two weeks, I’m also nervous. What if I’ve forgotten how to write a good subtext recap? Better pray extra hard to the gayzzoli gods Nov. 28th.

Camila GreySometimes I remember out of the blue that Cam and Leisha like to kiss on planes, and it makes my whole week.

Liv TylerI like that Liv has gotten a tad thicker since her dancing with Alicia Silverstone in her dad’s music videos days. It suits her.

Marsha ThomasonMarsha gets to kiss her gorgeous girlfriend on “White Collar,” and then get kissed by the gorgeous Kat Dennings on “2 Broke Girls.” Some women have all the luck.

Aubrey PlazaNBC is finally making my dream Thursday night happen and airing “30 Rock” and “Parks & Recreation” back-to-back at 8 and 8:30 starting Jan. 12. There is a TV god, and she loves me.

Diane KeatonDid you know Diane Keaton was on Twitter? She tweets some really interesting photos. She has a nice eye. Also nice on the eyes? Vintage Diane in a tank top.

Tank Top Tuesday: Unforgettable Edition

You would not believe how many of you have written me to tell me about “Unforgettable.” Like, so many. Emails. Tweets. Comments. I’m not saying you guys have been persistent, but the other day a paper airplane came through my window with “Have you watched Unforgettable yet?” written inside. So, I watched. And, ladies, I owe you a “You were right.” It’s not that I necessarily that I am blown over by the series itself. The pacing is a little leaden and Poppy Montgomery seems sorta sleepy. Also, the dialogue? A show about a woman who has the ability to remember every minute detail from her past has her actually says, without irony, “This memory thing of mine comes in handy sometimes.” Um, don’t go dusting off a space on your mantel for that Emmy just yet, writers. But, great googly-moogly, were you ever right about the tank tops. And the arm porn.

I’m not exactly sure how a police detective gets away with wearing tank tops every single day to work, but I am grateful for her ridiculous flaunting of the dress code. Or perhaps the tank tops are necessary for her to be able to remember things. Does her condition require she stays cool and has a full range of motion? I’m a few episodes behind so maybe I missed the explanation. But whatever the reason, I must applaud its results. Alright, ladies. You got me. You were so, so right.

So please enjoy this very special mea culpa edition of Tank Top Tuesday. Just making up for lost time. Tank tops + great arms + red hair = fairly unforgettable.

Plus she also wears lots of big silver rings. And you know how I have a thing for big silver rings. DVR: Set.

p.s. Since it has been such a long time since my last Tank Top Tuesday, please enjoy this bonus treat of hot chicks in tank tops wielding power tools. See, patience can be a good thing.

Tank Top Tuesday

Oh, basic white tank top. How simple you are. Yet how undeniably effective. Sure, other colors are also nice. Your blacks. Your blues. Heck, even your reds. But the white tank top, well, it’s just a classic. What it does is really focus our attention on what’s in the tank top, as opposed to the tank itself. The way it hugs the form is almost workmanlike, yet exposes a natural womanliness. It’s the perfect conduit for unadulterated sexiness. Sheer yet still a statement. Right, so are you buying any of this? Have I prattled on for a sufficient amount of time to justify just showing you the hot ladies in white tank tops now? Or have you not heard a single word I’ve said because for the last five minutes you’ve been staring at Naya Rivera with your mouth open and a thin line of drool forming on your chin? I know, two days in a row with the drool on your screens. So perhaps before proceeding today, might I suggest a bib?

Lena HeadeyI’m pretty sure Lena is laughing at my attempt to wax eloquent about the white tank top. I am totally OK with that as long as she keeps wearing one.

Yvonne StrahovskiWhat? I’m sorry. Have you been standing there long? My brain stopped working temporarily for some unknown reason and I had to do a full system reboot. Oh my God, is that Yvonne in a... Dammit, not again. Control-Alt-Delete.

Cote de PabloJust think, if things had gone differently on “NCIS” maybe Cote would be the one having eye sex and TGTGT with Angie Harmon on “Rizzoli & Isles” instead of Sasha Alexander. Man, just thinking about what those subtext recaps would be like is tripping me out.

Minka KellyDoes it make me a very bad lady if I tell you I’ve decided to skip the new “Charlie’s Angels,” or a very good one?

Jordana BrewsterI probably won’t watch Jordana’s new remake, “Dallas,” either. But I will search the network press site for pictures of her in a tank top. So, you know, win-win.

Zoe KravitzOf course the daughter of Lisa Bonet and Lenny Kravitz is gorgeous. Of course.

WARNING: The last picture is NSFW. Thank the technology gods for smartphones, eh?

Karina LombardThis is like Tank Top Tuesday and Naked Lady Monday had a love child, make that twins.